Running From Trump: America Calls Its Own Bluff

Photo: freedomsphoenix.com

I had a bit in my stand up routine where I mocked all those who vowed to evacuate the United States following the presidential election. When I performed it, I said it applied to people fearing both Hilary and Trump, but in writing it, I really only had the Trump opposition in mind.

It went along the lines of, “To everyone planning on packing up and getting out for the next four years, wherever you go, I hope you realize that at some point you’re going to have to explain that you are an American political refugee.”

10 Completely Realistic Predictions For The 2015 NFL Regular Season

Photo: hagacpas.com

17 new rounds of the most entertaining and second most profitable form of warfare are dawning. Football is back, and 256 battles for chalk-linked territory are ripe for the cosmos and metaphysical forces of the universe to strike havoc and disarray. What phenomenon’s and conundrums will we witness this year as we endure snip-its of gameplay between marathons of Miller Lite and Viagra commercials.

I have consulted my star charts and spoken in tongues over a bubbling cauldron of herbs, fungi and other things I scraped from under my front porch, to earn third sight into the forthcoming Sundays; and Monday nights, and Thursday nights, and probably a few Saturdays towards the end.

Humble mortals, I bestow upon you, my 10 visions of events to come in the 2015 NFL Season!